Donkeys Are Extra-Ordinarily Special, Even If The Horses Don't Think So

We have had a lot, and I mean a lot, of mud out here lately, which means that Dudley and I have been hanging out with the horses quite a bit because we are running low on non-flooded pasture. The horses are bothered by the mud and have been grouchy and out-of-sorts.  This means they have been pretty bossy and have spent considerable time trying to hog the big round bale of hay. They act like they own the place.  They have had little patience with us and have taken great pleasure in making fun of Dudley and me because we are short.  That really bugs us, but there's not much we can do other than go off and have fun playing by ourselves. They are really annoying us, but considering that Christmas is right around the corner, Dudley and I are trying to take the high road in hopes that Santa is watching. 

Anyway, I told you last time that I have been thinking about Christmas.  This certainly means Santa, but it also means I have been thinking about the Christmas story. You know, when Mary and Joseph had to go from Nazareth to Bethlehem because the ruler of the land proclaimed that everyone had to be registered?  And it was when they were on their way that Baby Jesus was born?  And that he was born in a stable because there was no room in any of the inns? 

Well, I want to reiterate a very important fact about the Christmas story (and I hope the horses read this), which is that Mary rode on a donkey.  Not a camel.  Not a horse.  I repeat...  Not a horse, but a donkey.  A short, sturdy, protective donkey.  And that the distance of their journey was so great they travelled for four to six days.  Let me tell you,  that is a long, long way, but I can assure you that their little donkey took very great care to carry Mary as comfortably as possible and to step quite carefully over rocks and ruts so she would not be jostled and lose her balance. If you have been reading my letters you know how much we love our people, and I just know that Mary and Joseph's donkey loved them and worked very hard to make the journey safe and comfortable, which is saying an awful lot. 

I just had to talk about that because the horses have been so full of themselves lately.  They don't always understand how important we are, and they are certainly not remembering the critically acclaimed role we played in the arrival of Baby Jesus.   Gosh, if it hadn't been for donkeys, we might not even have Christmas!  

So I really hope the horses lighten up and stop and think about the fact that donkeys, though not always respected, surely should be.  

Have a Merry Christmas everyone!  And may you all be lucky enough to find a donkey beneath your tree on Christmas morning...

Love, 

Donkey   

Missing My Barn Manager

So I have been thinking about Christmas coming up and that this is the time of year when most animals think about and want to be with those who mean the most to them.  There is someone I have been thinking about lately who is very important and who loves me.  I haven't seen him in awhile though.  It's been a long while, actually.  I miss him a lot and wish he was here.  I dreamed about him last night.  I dream about him a lot.

I'm talking about our barn manager.  He has been gone for a long time.  He is in a far away land that has a very funny name.  He is helping protect our country.   I think he is very brave to do this.  I pray every night that he is safe and warm and knows that we all are thinking of him. I miss him feeding me and taking care of me and talking to me and giving me treats, but I know that he has an important job to do and that he will be home as soon as he can get here.  I'm pretty sure he misses taking care of me too... well, all of us, really.

I hope he knows that we can't wait for him to come home...  even though waiting is hard. Sometimes it seems like forever.

So please hurry home as fast as you can.  We will all be here, waiting for you to talk to us and scratch our necks and tuck us in...  We miss you...

Love,

Donkey

Farm Emergency 911

So one of our favorite farm people was in our stall the other day and something quite unexpected happened. We were very surprised and could not believe our eyes. 

Our farm person knocked himself out.  Yep, one minute he was standing upright, looking quite normal as he took care of us, and the next moment he was laying on the stall floor, out cold.  Trust me, that has never happened before.  Dudley and I didn’t quite know what to make of it.  Now I know that some of you will think this is silly and that because I am a donkey I am not a reliable reporter, but I am not exaggerating one bit.  This is exactly what happened.  You can even ask Dudley if you don’t believe me.   He was right there and saw it all. 

It was a normal day.  Our farm person was feeding us dinner and changing our water.  I’m not sure he was paying attention because he does this all of the time and probably doesn’t need to think about it much.  Or perhaps he had a lot on his mind.  I’m not quite sure.  Well, while he was emptying the bucket of old water and throwing it from the barn into the pasture he took a big, giant step forward and konked his head on the low overhang.  Down he went.  

You see, Dudley and I – and the goats – (yes, I said the goats.  I have no comment on that one.  Well, actually, I do.  Sometimes when the goats escape from their pasture the farm people get annoyed and put them in with us because they cannot get out, which then annoys me.  But apparently my vote carries less weight than the humans, which I think is quite unfair, but I am stuck.  If anyone has any ideas, please let me know).  Anyway, as I was saying, we are in the stall for short animals. The horses could never comfortably fit in here so we stay in a part of the barn where the ceiling and overhang are low.  Our farm person is pretty tall, plus he was wearing a baseball hat and probably couldn’t see where he was going, though I still don’t quite understand.  He has been in our stall a thousand times and he knows the overhang is low.   Why didn’t he duck?  Ducking would have solved everything.  All we know is he was tossing water, hit his head, and down he went.   

Well, we didn't quite know what to do.  We have never before had one of our farm people all of a sudden fall down in our stall. He took up a fair amount of room, actually.  We took great care not to step on him.   

We were a little shocked so we waited... and watched... and waited some more.  It appeared he was breathing, which made us quite hopeful that he was not dead.  I'm not sure what we would have done if he was dead.  I’m pretty good under pressure.  Actually, I’m very good under pressure, but if someone were dead in my stall I would probably lose my composure.  So we continued to carefully watch him breathe. He didn't move. After a little while we thought we should try to wake him up and I did what any good, responsible donkey would do…

I licked his face.  Dudley stood and intently watched for life signs and I licked away. We worked on him for a number of minutes. 

Well, I am very, very happy to report that our farm person was not dead and that we woke him up and made sure he was ok.  We were enormously relieved.  He was sore and felt a little silly, I think.  He got up pretty slowly and we watched while he checked out whether he could walk.  He could.  He picked up his hat and rubbed his head a lot.  He was probably pretty sore. We told him he didn’t need to worry about our water bucket, but he filled it anyway and made sure we were ok for the night.  Despite his accidental loss of consciousness he had to make sure we were all tucked in.  As he left, we noticed that he was walking a little slow, but we were fairly certain he was going to be ok and would not die any time soon. We were awfully glad for that. 

I think under the circumstances the Dud and I did pretty well, considering we didn't have a first aid book on hand.  And may I point out that during all of this the goats did not contribute in any meaningful way... whatsoever... at all...  which is yet another commentary on the great value and protective nature of donkeys and why we out-rank the goats.  Yep, we sure carry our weight around here, that's for sure, and we were more than happy to assist.  Everyone does so much for us, it's the least we could do... 

Love,

Donkey

My Farm Lady

Because of my farm lady, three (count ‘em three) horses just went to their new farms!  This is very excellent news because our equine friends really deserved to have their very own families who will love them forever and ever!  Dudley and I hosted a little goodbye get-together in the pasture to send them off.  Our friends were sure looking a whole lot better compared to when they first came to us, that’s for sure.  They were feeling confident and happy; their bodies were sound and they were feeling just fine.  

While here, Major learned to stop jumping over stall doors and fences (that habit was not in his best interest, let me tell you).  He now knows how to stand quietly in his stall.  He sure worried everyone a whole lot when he first came here and he caused quite a bit of havoc, especially the morning he jumped the fence to get to the girls which was the same morning my farm lady had to leave for the airport.  Trust me, that was not a good day around here.  But Major eventually learned to relax and hang out and I know that all will be well in his new home.

Faith did an exceptional job raising her baby (remember my letter about the New Kid on the Block?)  We will miss her.  She was such a good mom.  Now this was a horse that was absolutely destined to go to that place where Unspeakable Things happen, but because of how that baby was born, and because of my farm lady (along with another very special farm person), they came here to live and Faith now has her own family and a little girl who adore her.  That story nearly brings tears to my eyes if I really think about what might have happened, it really does. Her story came very close to having a tragic ending.  

And Miss Belle found her forever home too.  When she came, she had wounds all over her body because when she worked in the fields no one paid attention to see if her plowing gear fit her properly.  It didn’t.  She had big sores when she came, but my farm lady tended to those wounds and Belle healed up just fine, started feeling good and was ready to go to her new farm in no time at all.

So my farm lady does remarkable things, although I’m not always sure she thinks so.  I’m just guessing, but I’m pretty sure she thinks she doesn’t do enough in this world.  She doesn’t always give herself credit for knowing what it means to the horses when she helps them relax and feel safe.  And she probably doesn’t think she is doing much when she gives them medicine or bathes them in special shampoo when their skin is rotting or they have big wounds.  And I’m not always sure she realizes what it means when she finds the horses their own special families who will love them and be gentle and kind to them forever.  She has been doing this for so long, she probably just thinks it is her job, but we all know that she saves the horses lives.  She is our hero.  She could not do more if she tried and we are really proud of her.

So she does big, important things like this and she does a lot of other things too, every day, even when she does not have the time.  Like making sure there is enough hay in the barn (donkeys believe this is a very critical item), and grain, and medicine when we need it, and making sure the animal doctor comes out if we aren’t feeling well, or the dentist or the chiropractor or the foot doctor.  But she also does other things that no one sees at all.  Like letting all of us know every day that she loves us and that we are safe and that it is her job to make sure we are OK and that we don’t have to worry about anything. 

 It doesn’t get any better than this, having her. We are the lucky ones…

So thank you for loving us, farm lady.  We see what you do every day.  And we all love you right back. 

 Love,

 Donkey   

 

It's Been A Good Week

I've been pretty productive around here lately, doing a little bit of this and a little bit of that.  Here are some of the highlights...

I've continued to spend a considerable amount of time keeping a watchful eye on the place, as I mentioned in my previous letter. 

Dudley has helped a bit.  I've got him in training.

This job requires an advanced level of skill, intelligence and patience. Not every donkey is qualified.

Here you get a good idea of just how how much expertise is required. 

I hope we get as much done this coming week.  Yep, we contribute a lot around here, that's for sure... 

Love,

Donkey

Sorry I Haven't Written In Awhile...

But I've been pretty busy keeping an eye on the place. 

Love,

Donkey

Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star

There are two adorable little girls who belong to one of our farm people.  I got to meet them not long ago.  They seem quite sweet and smart and well-behaved and they really love the horses.  That's for sure. 

You know what they did?  You will not believe this, I promise...

A few weeks ago they had the idea, all by themselves, to try and raise some money so that the farm people could save a horse from an auction where Unspeakable Things occur. The girls thought long and hard about how they could do this.  At first, they weren't sure what they could possibly do.  They are only small children, after all.  Well, they thought and thought and thought some more.  And this is what they thought up.  

The girls are both learning to play instruments.  One is getting quite good at "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star".  They thought they might play their instruments to raise some money.  So they made a sign and asked their mother to take them to town, and they set up on the sidewalk and played. And the town people who happened to walk by stopped to listen, and they read the sign and they learned about the horses that need help and they gave their hard-earned money to the girls so they could help a horse.  That is just amazing and heroic if you ask me. 

Well, these little girls played and played and raised enough money so that a very special boy horse, who was so scared, panicked, and frantic at the auction could come home to our farm.  The girls named him Justice, which is a very fine name.  Justice knows what the girls did and he loves them quite a lot for it.  See, the farm people (and children) love the horses, and the horses love them right back.  They know what the farm people do to help them.  Some of you might think this is silly, but it is very true.  I know. 

Anyway, while this might seem like a simple story about two little girls and some music, it is much more than that.  It is a very important story because it tells you what love can do.  And determination.  And the generosity of people...  which is what this place is all about.  


Thank you, little musicians... 

Love,

Donkey

They Did It Again

Honestly, my farm people never, ever stop.  Guess what they just did.  They had a party because they wanted company to come and meet us and learn about the horses that need help. Imagine that.  Planning and getting ready for a party when most normal people go on vacation, stretch out in a hammock and read a book, or watch baseball.  Someone should really clue them in…
 

What this means is that it has been a really, really busy few weeks around here, though I guess that is nothing new.  The farm people have continued taking care of us, of course, because that never stops.  Yep, feeding us, cleaning stalls, scrubbing and filling water buckets and making sure our big box fans are plugged in have taken up a whole lot of their time.  And because it has been so hot there have been a bunch of days when we have been inside until the sun starts to go down, which means there is even more stall-cleaning and they have had to deal with us emptying water buckets as fast as they can fill ‘em.  And we have new horses, four of them, who need medicine and bandages, plus they need the farm people to simply be with them to talk to them and help them understand that they are going to be taken care of and loved, so that takes up a whole bunch of time, but the farm people don’t mind that part at all.  I'm pretty sure they love that part the most.

 

Everyone has also been busy getting hay up into the top of the barn, mowing, pulling weeds, raking, putting down mulch and painting to get ready for our company.  I told them no one would care about a few weeds, it is a farm after all and the farm is in the country and our company surely would not mind a few weeds, but my farm people wouldn’t listen and pulled away…  They can be hard-headed sometimes… and I am very qualified to say that because I know a thing or two about holding one’s ground.

 

So I am glad to report that we were ready for our company on time and we met a lot of nice people who came to meet us and learn about the horses. 

I thought you might like to see what happened around here…

The horses met some wonderful children, who really loved them. 

Dudley did a great job greeting everyone. 

I did too.  Check out my new halter. I think I look dashing.

A cowboy rode his trusty steed. 

There were hay rides in the pasture. Everyone liked that a lot.

Everyone visited with our new little filly, Sprite.

So we met lots of nice kids and grown ups and everyone had a lot of fun and loved meeting all of us.  It was a good day around here and the farm people were very glad that everyone came out for a visit.  We'll have to do it again sometime.

Love,

Donkey

Who Knew?

Well, all I can say is who knew that the little Dud would actually be a fairly decent ambasador, and out in public no less!  I know!  It's amazing and shocking, I agree. Guess that vet visit awhile back did some good. 

Here's what I'm talking about.  The farm people were invited by a very nice lady at Pet Supplies Plus to come to their store so customers could learn about our farm and what we do for the horses.  It was a very, very nice invitation and the farm people were excited to go.  So a few weeks back, on a Saturday morning, they headed out with storyboards, T-shirts and the fake stuffed horses to sell, and all kinds of other things in boxes. I'm not sure what was in all those boxes, but it was a lot of stuff.

I sort of guessed they were going to take Lego too.  Did I ever mention him?  He is the miniature horse that lives here and he is kind of a mascot too (though I am higher ranking) and kids just love him because he is small and well behaved.  Well, he is pretty well behaved when he is not pawing the ground or trying to eat every non-edible thing in sight, like brushes and buckets and zip ties.  So I knew that Lego would probably be heading out.  But I never, ever guessed that they'd think about taking Dudley, with the driveway incident and all.  Now I completely understand why they considered this idea. He is rather small and they thought kids would like him and would be interested in meeting a donkey.  All I can say is the farm people must have had a lot of faith in the vet because they ended up taking him on a road trip. 

At first I was a little bummed that I wasn't going to represent the farm and all good-natured donkeys everywhere, however I remembered that all animals who go on outings have to be clean.  And that is when my interest in going immediately stopped.  For my long-time readers, I think you'll remember my position on cleanliess.  For those of you who have not read all of my letters you might want to reference "I Don't Think So" which is a letter I published back in March.  This will help you understand what I am talking about.  It's a position I simply cannot  compromise.

Well, I was right and I knew for sure that I was right when Lego was fetched from the pasture and got a bath and got his tail braided (give me a break, he's a boy!) and Dud got hosed off and all brushed and got his hooves picked.  Of course he stood like a little statue while he was getting groomed, just to show off and to try and prove he is calm and easy-going.  I'm pretty sure he is still on his best behavior to avoid any risk whatsoever of going back to the auction, but whatever...  Nonetheless, he got cleaned up, he loaded in the trailer after Lego (yep, very show-offy) and off they went.  I wondered how things would go. 

Well, you can see for yourself.  Here are some picture about their day...

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Here they are.  All set up and ready for visitors.

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Lego and Dud had their own story board. 

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Me too.  But I had one all to myself.  (Thank you, Mary!)

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This is Lego.  Kids love him. 

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Unlike me, Lego loves getting brushed.

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A new friend.

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Dudley had his fans too.
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Trying to prove he is better than me and that he likes getting brushed.  Show off.  


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Giving a kiss.

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Getting treats. Yeah, he made out like a bandit.

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Begging for a french fry.

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Meeting a new non-kid friend.

So they had a great day and taught some people about the farm and what they could do to help, if they wished.  And the very, exceptionally nice Pet Supplies Plus lady gave us a gigantic donation so that we could rescue more horses!  How surprising and wonderful is that!  The farm people were very happy indeed and and thought it was better than Christmas  morning, let me tell you.  They are still smiling about that one...

I'm thinking that it will be just fine if Dudley wants to continue getting cleaned up to go on outings.  I'll stay here and keep an eye on the place and keep on being the important mascot that I am and keep writing you letters. 

Yep, I think that will work out just fine, just fine indeed. It was a good day...

Love,

Donkey

Not Yet Sure: Part II

If you will remember, I was telling you about Dudley's obsession with me and how he is stalking me day and night and that he beckoned me to the fence line not too long ago.  Remember?  And remember that I didn't tell you the whole story to keep you in suspense?  Well, I think I actually blew the suspense part because I think I should not have waited so long to tell you the rest of the story. It occurred to me that if you wait too long, you lose your audience so I'm really sorry about that.  And I think my editor is none too happy about that mistake either.  They want more people to read about the farm.  They don't want people to get annoyed with me.  So now I think I'm going to be micro-managed and have deadlines because I messed up the timing.  Great. I'm pretty sure I'm not going to like being on probation and I am quite sure I will be utterly dismayed if my reporting job goes to you-know-who...  Remember, those guys who are even shorter than me... 

Anyway, I was telling you about the Dud zeroing in on me all of the time and that there was one particular day that I agreed to come over to see him, though I was not quite sure what was going to happen.  I very bravely approached the fence, not knowing what to expect and not quite sure what I was going to say.  And here is what happened.  Are you ready?  Are you feeling suspense right now?  Because if you are I may have done my job after all and maybe my editorial board will back off...

So here is what happened...

We sniffed.

We practiced being next to each other.



We sniffed some more and stared. 



We had a talk. I told him he needed to back off.  I said it nicely, but firmly.

And that's it!  Nothing else occurred!  Of course there was the obligatory ear pinning and tail swishing and snorting because Little D still secretly thinks he is the big cheese.  But there was not an over abundance of testosterone and there were no teeth and he didn't want to kill me.  Hallelujah! He was definitely much calmer and not inclined to fight.  I think he's going to settle down and drop the dramatics. Well, at least he did today, which is a start. We have to be thankful for small steps.

So for right now I don't think you have to worry about us.  I think the Dud now understands that I am the boss and he is the new guy on the block and he just has to back off.  Yep, I think I'm handling this just fine...  My talk obviously did some good and I am very encouraged by our progress... 

Love,

Donkey

Not Yet Entirely Sure About the Dud

I'm still not entirely sure about little Milk Dud, as you shall see...  I must say I am relieved that he remains on the other side of the fence.  

He always knows where I am and what I am doing.  He has radar and is constantly tracking me.  Doesn't he have anything else to do?

Now he's working his way to the fence line.   I am on the other side.

Now he is staring at me and sending ESP messages.  

Better get this over with and see what he wants.  (I'm the guy on the left).

I hope this goes ok...

You will be surprised to find out that you have to stay tuned for the rest of the story.  My editor says I need to work on creating suspense so my readers come back and statistics don't drop.   Sorry, but you will just have to keep checking in to see what happens...   (Editors and editorial boards can be annoying.  I much prefer having creative license over my work.)

Love,

Donkey

He Has a Name!

I just heard that the new whippersnapper has a name after the farm people and all of our friends gave this a lot of careful thought and consideration.  But best of all I am very happy to report that the farm people listened to me and did not name him something that would forevermore frighten me or forevermore make it hard for me to be in charge of him.  I'm thanking everybody for that one!  I think this proves that I am loved quite a lot, and for that I am eternally grateful. See, I told you the farm people understand and love animals...

Of course you are wondering what the new donkey's new name is....  Well, it's not anything like "Zeus"or "Your Majesty" which is a very good thing and which I was quite worried about.  It's Dudley! I think it is perfect. It will work just fine because hearing his name won't take me back to the terrible day in the driveway and it allows me to maintain my preferential rank in the pasture.  But best of all, you can make a food out of it...  Watch.  Milk Dud!  See?  Not scary. Not scary at all.  I am breathing a big sigh of relief, let me tell you.

I think The Dud and I are going to be just fine. Yep, Little D is a perfect name.

So thank you farm people for helping me out.  You are the best...

Love,

Donkey

Suggestions for Naming the New Donkey

I know that people are giving a lot of thought to what we should name the new donkey.  I have been thinking about this as well and here are some suggestions... not that anyone has asked me.  Humph...  


I would definitely not recommend giving him a name that has anything to do with power, strength, or authority.   His head is already too big and my job is to take him down a notch or two.  This means that a name like Czar or Thor is out.  If he had a name like that he would think he was the lightweight champion of the pasture and we'd never hear the end of it.  The horses definitely agree with me here.  Ask any of them.  I mean  really, can you picture it?  I am going to be in charge of this guy (eventually, once he figures out that he is not the boss), which means I will be telling him what to do sometimes.  And I imagine he might not always be thrilled with my direction.  How will it ever work if he has a big, important name?  It would be like me saying "Your Highness,  I get in line first for breakfast, not you", like he is going to listen to that.  Or "Your Highness, get out of here.  Major and I are playing right now and you are not invited".  C'mon.  That is just not realistic.  My job is going to be hard enough without having to defer to him on account of a name!


Plus, a big, fancy name would give me flashbacks because I'd be constantly reminded of the terrible day in the driveway when my life flashed before my eyes.  That would definitely not be a good thing.  Just imagine if his name was Terminator.  For evermore, when anyone calls him or talks to him or about him, and I'm around, I will think of the scary day in the drive when he tried to take me down.  I can easily imagine that I could be having a perfectly fine day, grazing or hanging out with the farm people and someone would say "Where's Terminator?" or "Did you hear what Terminator did today?" and in that split-second-of-a-moment I would be taken back to the day I got beat up.  I'd be scared all over again.  You want my post traumatic stress symptoms to go away, don't you? Trust me, that kind of name will not help me at all.  And, if needed, I can probably find a shrink who will vouch for me on that one... 


So after much thought, I say name him after food.   Food would be good and it would definitely not give me flashbacks. Food isn't scary and it isn't going to go to his head.  I'd suggest Muffin or Buckwheat.  Actually, you can try any food.  It all works.  Watch.  Pepperoni. Not scary. Hershey. Spud.  Nope, not scary. You can literally say any food and it does not conjure up images of the driveway incident.  Or, if you don't like the food idea we could give him a nice name from an interesting historical figure or TV personality, something like Edsel, Gershwin, Columbo or Radar.  See? Not even remotely scary... Or maybe a name like Elroy or Junior, a name that is obviously lower ranking than Donkey.  That'd be great too and would keep me from feeling all frightened and jittery and remembering the day I was almost killed.   


I'm just saying that in the end his name should be benign and a statement of his rank, it should not jeopardize my mental health or undermine my status in the pasture. While I realize no one asked (yeah, like that didn't escape me), these are my recommendations on naming him anyway... 

So I sincerely hope I have some clout around here and that the farm people will take my suggestions into consideration as they think about naming this guy.  

Thank you everyone.  


Love,


Donkey

Bulking Up

Major agreed to train me and it's going pretty well.  We work out twice a day, once in the early morning and again in the evening, after it cools off.  First, there are laps around the pasture, then wind sprints and then we use the weave poles for agility.  That takes care of cardio. I am working hard on strength training.  In addition, I am practicing bobbing, ducking, dodging and spinning on my feet.  Trust me, I'm practicing the these things a lot because I think it's going to save my hide if you-know-who decides to come after me again.  I am pleased to report that I am seeing results.  My strength is improving.  I am definitely quicker on my feet.  My confidence has returned. 

At night the farm people have been putting the new whippersnapper in a stall by me so we can see each other and practice being near each other.   He has not yet tried to sink his teeth into me under the cover of darkness, but then, I am a light sleeper so he doesn't have much of a chance.  A few times the farm people have put us together again in the driveway, just for a little while, to give me a chance to show the new donkey my stuff.  And I am pleased to report that I have!  The new guy thought about taking me down, and tried, but because I have been working out and am much quicker on my feet I have been able to spin and glare and bite and he has backed off.  Hooray for me!  I think he will learn in time.  I really do. It would be nice if we could be buddies some day.  Another short guy running around here might be kind of fun. 

So things are going better.  My side doesn't hurt any more, the bite  marks are healing, and I am pretty sure he is not going to get the upper hand again.  Oh yeah, and the animal doctor is coming today so that should help.  So now he'll be sore for a few days.  We'll see what happens after he heals up...  I'll keep you posted.

Love,

Donkey

PS: By the way, here is a picture of the beast... looking all cute and harmless...Trust me, he's not...

Current Strategy for Dealing with New Whippersnapper While I'm Bulking Up

Hiding...





but staying alert.  You can't be too careful.  



Oh oh.  Here he comes. Better duck. 

He'll never find me... 

Love,

Donkey

The Young Whippersnapper vs.The Farm Mascot

Well, it's been an interesting week around here, that's for sure.  Of course, everyone is still sad about Ginger and that is just going to take time.  You simply can't rush making all the sad feelings go away.

But there's another big thing that I need to tell you. When the farm people went to the auction to get Ginger a few weeks back they also got another donkey!!!   I don't know if you already knew that.   Maybe you read it on the website.  But, yep, there's a little mini me running around here.  I am glad that he didn't end up in that place where Unspeakable Things happen to animals, and I have definitely learned that there is enough love to go around, so I am not worried people will like him more than me, but you really aren't going to believe this one.

Everything started out alright. When new animals come to the farm they need to be kept separate from all of us in case they are sick, so at first I didn't see him because he was in the other barn.  But you can bet your bottom dollar I heard him!  That boy has a set of lungs on him that you would not believe!  The farm people said he sounds like me on helium, which I guess is a compliment, but he is really, really loud and really, really  high-pitched and he can bray forever!  He has an impressive set of chops, let me tell you!  The horses only wish they could whinny for so long and in such an authoritative fashion.  Needless to say I was very, very curious when I heard this new boy from afar.

And of course I also knew he was here because I heard the farm people talking about him.  It happens every single time we get a new animal, so I'm pretty used to it.  And of course it's no surprise they were saying things like:

1)  He's so cute!  (Like I haven't heard that one before.)
2)  He looks like a big stufffed animal!  (Heard it.)
3)  Awwwww... Look at that face! (Hey, all donkeys are adorable.  It's no surprise that he has a cute face).
4)  He is so good!  He is 180 degrees different from our Donkey!  (OK, so I guess he picks up his feet without any problem to get his hooves picked.  Big deal...I say it's still the honeymoon phase and he is not going to risk being dropped back off at the auction. You bet he is not going to make a fuss. I predict that this cooperative thing will change though... he's a donkey after all.)

So basically, I gathered that the new mini me looks like a donkey and is cooperative (at least for the time being.  I still have my doubts.)  I was quite curious indeed...

Well, the farm people decided that we could finally meet and this is when the other part of this big story happens.  They brought us both out in the driveway (don't worry, the gate was closed so we were safe and couldn't go anywhere, which was both a good thing and a bad thing, as you will see) and I'll be darned if the new whippersnapper charged me and tried to kill me...  Literally.  I'm not exaggerating one bit.  You can ask the farm people.  Before I, or anyone, knew it, that little mini me who is "so cute" and who "looks like a stufffed animal" and "is 180 degrees better than" me (yeah, someone better take that one back) tried to take my head off.  In the blink of an eye I was on the ground, his front legs were wrapped around my neck, and he was trying to sink his teeth into me! I was so taken by surprise (and so incredibly pinned down by a testosterone-charged newbie who unfairly took the upper hand when I wasn't even looking) that I couldn't move. And that's saying a lot because I am way bigger than he is and very, very strong.  But, nope, I was pinned and I wasn't going anywhere.   He was determined to take me down.. and out...

My life flashed before my eyes...

The farm people ran over and ran him off, though it took some doing.  When I could stand up I ran off too because self preservation sounded like a really good idea and donkeys are all about self preservation.  But in the commotion, with all the running, we both rounded the horse trailer from opposite sides, came nose to nose again, and he took me down a second time!  Wow, I was not expecting another round.  The farm people intervened again and got him off of me.  They were actually able to separate us that time (good thing) and they made a very wise rule which states that we cannot be with each other, at least not for right now.  They are really worried this new boy could kill me!  So I have been limping around here for the past few days with a sore side and wounded pride.   I'm going to be ok, but it was quite a shock, let me tell you.

Well, now that things have settled down, the last laugh is on him because I happen to know that the animal doctor is coming to see him and perform a certain procedure, if you know what I mean.  The farm people hope this is going to calm him down and put an end to his "I wanna be the lightweight champion of the pasture" attitude.  In the meantime, just to play it safe,  I think I am going to start bulking up so that I'll be in better shape in the event there is another round.  Maybe Major can be my personal trainer...  Yeah, that's a good idea.. a really good idea..     

So here's looking over my shoulder and keeping an eye out, at least for the time being.

Like I said, it's been an interesting week...  I hope next week is better.

Love,

Donkey